“if only you could see”

February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 May 2010 June 2010 September 2010 October 2010 January 2011 March 2011 April 2011 May 2011 August 2011 August 2012 September 2012 October 2012 November 2012 August 2013 November 2013 December 2013 January 2014 June 2014 July 2014 August 2014 May 2015 May 2016 June 2016 July 2016 December 2016 June 2017 July 2017 June 2018 November 2020 December 2020 April 2021 November 2021

the sandwich i'm eating
The Black Keys
listening to music
you (the you who is reading this)
riding my bike, day or night
swimming with friends
working
Jason Mraz
sweet tea
Black Blood of the Earth
natural history museums
Dinasoars
being unproductive
Harry Potter
writing
math


and of course several other things I can't think of right now. That's usually how it goes. I can't remember what I meant to say, so instead I'll say "this".

You know, it's funny what life does to you! When you do things you didn't expect to do. But you know....now that I have, I feel more aware? I'm not sure. I feel like I didn't do anything wrong. Is it because nothing bad happened? Or is it because it's not really wrong to do in the first place? You know, I am 21 years old. I'm SUPPOSED to be having fun. Right? So I will. I am. I have been.

I need to do what makes me happy. And so far, I have been. So there you go! I'm working, I'm living, I'm having fun. I really am happy with where I'm at right now. At this precise moment. Did I expect to be here, to be in this situation? Of course not. Who does? But you know what. It's okay. Things are cool. Once I move out, things will be more than just cool. Things will be amazing. There won't be any negative reminders. Only pleasant memories of what we shared, right? Sometimes it will be difficult to think of it that way, but I will do what I have to. You know what, though? It is pretty strange that I am already feeling this way, not even quite 3 months yet. Maybe....

Without meaning to sound too cheesy or stupid, maybe I am kind of like a free spirit? I'm not sure. I am ready and willing to love. I enjoy being in a relationship. You know, I didn't really try to save our relationship. Like once we broke up we never got back together, didn't even try or anything. When I realized where the conversation was heading.... well, he couldn't say it. So I let him go. He still broke up with me but he had a hard time saying those words. He knew it would hurt me. It's okay though.

Open up and let them in, just don't be afraid to set them free again...