I really wonder how you feel on these nights so alone

“if only you could see”

WHAT CAN BE BETTER THAN THIS DAY.

Feb 18, 2008 || 8:33 PM || comment?

so today was pretty much a GOOD day. I got help from friends. Went out with Adam for dinner and movie. Bought a kick ass-shirt and prom shoes (which I will need to learn to walk in before the time comes, because DAMN they are heels.) And that's what made today such a good day. I don't know, I feel pretty emphatic about this day, like what a great way to start the week? And so I have work tomorrow and pretty much every day this week after school but WHO CARES because I don't have to work the weekend (most likely because Shanna needs the monies and that's okay with me.)

I went to Radioshack and talked to the manager and he told me to bring in my camera so he can help me with potentially bringing photography back to life (for those not clued in, I'm pretty sure I accidentally threw away my charger. yeah.) So that's pretty awesome. For the check list on prom I have: my shoes. I'm pretty sure I want to get my hair curled for that, because I saw Trang on twirp night and her hair was PRETTY cute. So yeah. And I'm either getting a red or white or black dress because my shoes are black, and too cute.

I also went to the bank and the lady is like, "You don't need to close your account (because it's under my mom's name and I thought to get a debit card I would need to open my own account but NOT SO.), you can just keep it under your mom's name." So that's also pretty awesome, I'll probably be getting my debit card within the next week or so depending on snail mail. Which is actually pretty fast sometimes. I am hoping that this will help me be more cautious and conscience of my money because I spend that stuff fast. So here's to me and building better saving skillz.

ANOTHER thing I need to get my ACT score sent to ULL because apparently I wasn't so smart sophomore year and either didn't write down my school's code or messed it up so it never got sent to Barbe, isn't that wonderful? SO that's like eight to fifteen dollars, depending on urgency. But I'm pretty excited about all of these future event, and the present is looking pretty good too.

This is all "just-so-you-know" stuff. I need to write something like a story, or continuation of one so I need to pause a minute and...get my quadrile that I stole from my Chemistry class. (:

__________"Common Pleasures."_______________

It was early morning but she wouldn't have known it if it weren't for the alarm clock on the side table; the white room had no windows. The lights were kept dim so she could sleep, but also so she wouldn't be in total darkness. On a hook secured to the wall was a change of clothes. A simple dress similar to the one she wore. It was cream colored with a pink ribbon to tie back. She scanned the room; were they watching her? It wasn't likely, but it wasn't as if her current situation were normal either. She got out of bed and dressed quickly. Below where the dress was hanging were a pair of black slip on shoes. She was surprised to find they fit her perfectly. With her right hand, she touched the wall, feeling the grain with her fingertips. It was rather smooth, but it still had its imperfections. She sighed as she walked back to the bed. When would the day begin? She woke up rather early, but she knew she wouldn't be able to go back to sleep. Or maybe, she was free to leave as she pleased? As long it was inside this...place. She walked to the door and gripped the knob. Turning it, she found no resistance; she had to admit to herself she thought it would have been locked. The hall didn't have anymore light than her room. Was anyone else beside herself awake? She wondered when the robot's day began, she remembered that yesterday he had a "late" start. She remembered the conference room she was dragged into not a day ago. She shuffled her feet as she moved forward, remembering each turn; she would not soon forget. When she made it to the doorway, she finally looked up to see the Director. She gasped in surprise, then took a step back.

"I'm sorry...I didn't see you there."

He smiled just as he had the day before. "Not many people do. Come sit with me. I've got some tea." He didn't wait to see if she would accept, he just turned and sat at the table. She noticed three cups, but it was only her and Director. Before she could sit, he had already poured a cup for her and himself. He left the third empty.

"Do you always wake so early? Or maybe you're having trouble sleeping."

She was blowing on the tea, attempting to cool it enough for at least one sip.

"I..I guess I'm a little nervous, that's all." She brought the cup to her lips, but only succeeded in burning her tongue.

"Naturally. While I was still in the process of making him, I couldn't sleep a wink. I followed the research of several scientists before I finally made a prototype as refined as he is."

"A..prototype? Do you plan to make more than one? Or, will he be the only one?"

"Oh no, of course not. It took a large portion of our funds just to make him. Like you said, he will the only one. How did you like visiting with him yesterday? I find him to be delightful company."

"Well, that's just it. He's very partial to you. He seemed upset when he couldn't walk in the garden but..I think what most upset him was that had we been able to, he wouldn't have enjoyed it as much because you weren't there."

"Yes. He's silly about that. I'm the only person that's ever worked on him. I suppose he has grown fond of me. But I hope the same will happen with you."

"Why me?"

"Well, if you don't want to, that's fine. It really doesn't have to be you. It could be anyone in this building. But you'll be with him the most, so you were the most reasonable candidate."

"Oh. I'm not really bothered by it, I was just curious." She took another sip of her tea. This time it didn't burn her tongue. It was soothing, but still she doubted she'd be able to go back to sleep.

"How do you like the tea?"

She fumbled to set the cup down. "It's good," she said, nodding.

"That's good. Actually, he made this. I woke him up a little bit earlier today to make up for yesterday's late start," the Director said with a wink. "It was funny though, the first thing he asked was if it was raining."

She looked back down at the cup. She wondered about the robot, on a more technical level, what he was made of, how he was maintained, and the like.

"How does he keep...clean?" She remembered how his outer appearance was much like skin.

"His skin, if you will, is made of a synthetic material that is easily cleaned with ethanol. His hair is also easy to maintain, and easy to replace if he so desires."

"Can he eat? I noticed he turned out with the microchip inserted, but is there anything else?"

"He loves food. He can eat just as well as you or I can, but it's purely for image. There are two glass tubes inside of him filled with a very specific chemicals. The first is enough to dissolve whatever he eats, and the second converts the dissolved material into a usable fuel throughout his day. Luckily, he doesn't have a preference for foods, so he enjoys anything he eats."

"That's really interesting. Is it necessary to make him that much like us? I was wondering...why? I know there are several kinds of robots in our society but..why are you trying to make a common bond between us? Do you think it's possible they could over power us?"

"These are common fears. And it is possible: if we create them to be just like us, they will want power as well. But from there, I believe that majority rules. And last time I heard you and I alone outnumber him. I do not feel that could ever be a problem."

She stared at the tea in her cup make swirls as he explained everything. The robot made this tea?

"Where is he now?"

"He's in the kitchen making breakfast. Why don't you join us?"

--------------------------------------------------------------

From above, the sun shone brightly, and the light reflected off the glass of her watch. It was a gift from the Director. She was outside, walking next to the robot who held several jasmine flowers in his cupped hands. They headed for a stone bench that looked directly at a fountain in the middle of the garden.

"Smell them," he said to her, as he brought his hands towards her face. She leaned forward and inhaled deeply. The smell reminded her of a candy she used to eat when she was younger.

"It smells really nice," she said with a smile. He nodded and she remembered a question she wanted to ask.

"Why do you like the garden so much?"

He looked at her face, studying her eyes, and she felt as if he could see right through her. She watched as he seperated his hands, and the flowers drifted to the ground.

"Do you think that because I'm not like you, I can't enjoy a walk in the park? That because you're human, I can't possibly appreciate the sun that warms your skin? I feel it too. And maybe I shouldn't delight in the way these flowers smell, or their color. But it's okay because I understand more than you do. You don't fully know what I am, and that's okay." He stood after this and walked back towards the entrance. They only made it halfway through the garden, and she was sure she ruined the rest of it for him. She sighed, glaring at the jasmine limp on the cobblestones, and simply listened as the water splashed on the concrete surface of the fountain.